Let's see if Amazon publish this

Bottom: Mindless Violence

"For 25 years, Rik Mayall and Adrian Edmondson have been kicking the shit out of each other…" says the box, and this all is the violent bits on one DVD.

But while there are several good laughs in this, which at least makes it better than Guest House Paradiso, there are also two mysteries. (Three, if like some of the other reviewers, you wonder why anyone would buy it!)

First, why is Amazon showing this as an '18' certificate when the BBFC website says it is, and always has been, a '15'?

The second is more easily solved – the actual show is 1 hour 49 minutes, or 109 minutes long, and Amazon, the BBFC and the box all say the run-time is 139 minutes. Where's the other half hour then? Well, if you keep watching after the credits, you'll see a) a slow-motion replay of some of what you've just sat through set to music, b) some very early Rik and Ade (the classic 'gooseberry' routine, which is actually much better than most of the rest of this disc) and c) after it 'finishes', the missing 30 minutes.

This is just text. Which, if your player respects 'user prohibited operations' on the disc, you can't fast forward. As all the messages are all on screen for over two minutes, you could be forgiven for being a bit miffed. Fortunately, this player doesn't respect them, appropriately enough given their content:

"That's it."

"No, really, that's it. We're not joking."

"There is nothing more, you are simply wasting your time."

"Please stop watching."

"And don't do that either!"

"This is going to end very badly for you, and you'll have no-one to blame but yourself."

"You're a twat, aren't you?"

"Oh yes you are!"

"You fucking well are!"




"Wank biscuit!"

"Arse vomit!"

Everyone else would have said the feature was 109 minutes, and the disc had 30 minutes of 'extras'. Or just not counted this. No, they lead you to think the feature is longer than it is. Oh, what wits and wags the boys are!

Hang on, I misspelt those w-words…

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